It wasn’t that he was the coolest boy in the school, (he was one of them). He was a senior and one of the fine ones. Not tall but then she herself was not tall. He just had it and his name was cool. Girls generally liked him. She more than liked him. She wanted to be his wife.
She decided to tell her school mum, (this concept: the School mum concept wasn’t very common place anymore but then somehow she had one). So she told her she liked him and she wanted a hook up. She wasn’t necessarily sure he was told because he didn’t act any different, if anything he seemed even more comfortable and at ease around her. It seemed maybe her prospects of being what she wanted to him were looking up.
Everyone in the dormitory and even in class knew by now. But.. She didn’t care, he was friendly to her and she just knew he would soon come right out and ask her out. She had written her name as his future wife in her diary, some notebooks. As sure as she could be, she fawned over him trying to show him her good qualities. When they were in the cafeteria and some of his year mates and friends went to talk to him and his friends, she found a way to tag along.
Then one day as she stood by the basketball court and he shot a few hoops by himself, she walked up to him till he noticed and tried to strike up a conversation. Implying things and giving hints, she expected him to seize the opportunity to ask her out. He faced her at a point and said simply, “Can you please leave me alone, I’m busy here”.
Two weeks later he was going out with another girl, a senior and that was that.
Abigail in the Bible is one woman that I like for some reason. She wasn’t as popular as Ester or Deborah but to me she was something. She is a prime example of the truth of the statement ‘if a guy wants you, he gets you’. She had just one encounter with David and once her husband died he sought for her, after just one encounter.
Most of us females suffer from male idol adoration, once we have a crush on some guy all our focus and energy goes towards him. We spend time, thinking about him, assuming about him and so on. So most times we suffer from heartache when the guy is not even aware of the undying love proclaimed for him in his absence.
It’s hard to find a means to refocus feelings and thoughts. What I did when I was in this typical situation was to totally disassociate myself from the said person and then I starting trying to force myself to think things like, ‘ it’s not like he could ever like me’, ‘I’ll focus on other things’ and most especially, ‘there’s more fish in the ocean’. Sometimes it worked.
Is it the right thing to do and is it easy to remain so unassuming? Well millions of people have been single all their lives till the point of marriage. Our ancestors did it (although they married earlier). However the point is that we are not so few single ladies and I’m wondering what we all do at this point in our lives. We do what God would want us to do. Build up. It’s hard I know, more on this later. I’m just opening this thought.
It’s really not so easy to being a lady, bearing the feelings we cannot explain. Sometimes we don’t understand ourselves, we are worried about most everything, and you cannot begin or start imagining. I guess it all boils down to trust in our creator, and focusing on loving him. He will turn out to be more loyal, loving and honest than any other in all your life. It’s hard focusing and all but I guess we get there somehow one step at a time.
So main point today, forcing yourself on some guy never works. So well let’s just wait.
Point one: Try as much as possible to have platonic feelings (one of the hardest things to do, I know).
Point two; we all feel these things, dream those dreams etc.
Point three, keeping busy never hurts.